you-wish-you-had-this-url:

warriorchicken:

I look like an extremely professional fashionable woman in an Abaya. It probably took me AGES to look this professional right?image

WRONG. I’m actually wearing my onesie underneath it and you will NEVER KNOW MWAHAHAHA

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Wanna know another secret? Even though i LOOK like I’m paying attention to whatever nonsense you are saying…..

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I AM ACTUALLY WEARING HEADPHONES AND LISTENING TO MUSIC

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  BAM!

THIS IS TOO MUCH POWER FOR ONE PERSON TO HAVE

18,969 plays

porpentine:

i’m into really low commitment hangouts like lying on the floor near each other or falling asleep together or falling into an endless void together

Whoops

  • MAC Saleslady: ...and you can just wear that out to your date, just like that.
  • Me: Thanks! I'm on my way to work actually.
  • MAC Saleslady: Are you a dominatrix?
  • Me: Is my resting bitchface that bad?
  • MAC Saleslady: Uh, no, but your riding crop is sticking out of your purse.
  • Me: ...